There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
