Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
