the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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