Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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