she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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