It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
