i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Randomize
