i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
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