I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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