omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
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