i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
