Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
