She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Randomize
