i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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