never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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