you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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