I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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