So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
