just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
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