We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
