and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I need a hoe opinion
go on
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
