its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize
