Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
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