I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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