No, drunk sperm still make babies.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
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