This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Randomize
