Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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