Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize