So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
He? As in you personified your dick?
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
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