he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
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