Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize