im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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