On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Randomize
