sorry about calling you the devil all night.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Randomize
