He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Randomize
