yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
