this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
