I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
