after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
