Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
