Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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