So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Randomize
