is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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