The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Randomize
