wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Randomize
