yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
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