i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize