oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Randomize
