i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
