i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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